Segen
I arrived at home seeing Boden sitting in the living room. His eyes were empty looking down the floor.
"I don't deserve this." I burst.
"You don't. I am sorry."
Boden
"Why did you do that? Why Boe? I asked you not to lie to me anymore. But you kept lying. You were even furious at me when I asked you for the truth. You said you loved me but you didn't."
"I'm sorry."
"Why Boe? I don't need your sorry. I need you to tell me why. I did everything I could to make you feel more comfortable. I changed a lot for you. I don't deserve this. Why?
"I'm sorry."
"You brought him here, my home, our home. You had sex with him on our bed. You told him that you wanted to be with him. You'd leave me for him."
"I'm sorry. I am ashamed. I think it's best for me to be alone."
...
It broke me hard seeing Segen bursted into tears. I blamed myself. I hated myself. I didn't tell him the truth because I didn't want to hurt him more. But I did by doing so.
I knew that was the end. Segen would never forgive me for what I'd done. That was sucks because I loved him more after all of this. I wanted to be with him. But I knew I had no right to ask that.
...
"That's what you want?" Segen asked me.
"I don't know."
"Do you want me?"
"No." Of course I wanted him, I just couldn't see him getting hurt by a monster like me.
"So you wanna be with Offen?"
"Of course not. I love you." The truth.
"Bullshit."
"Do you still love me?"
"Really? Why am I still here then? I want you to want me. I love you no matter what. And I feel stupid for that."
"I want you."
"You said you don't."
"I lied. Again. I'm sorry."
"I want you too."
Segen
"Do you think I'm stupid?" I asked Boden that night.
"No. I think you are someone with a big heart. I didn't think I deserved you, I didn't think you would still love me."
"I love you."
"I love you even more."
"Promise me one thing."
"What?"
"Say that more often from now on."
"I promise."
Boden
It was a happy ending, don't you think?
I was blessed. But I hadn't told Segen that my office partners never asked me to go out of town that weekend. I went so I could spend that weekend with Offen. Should I tell him? Will it break him, again?
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